Limits On Intimacy Levels In Relationship

In one of my classes that I took this past semester, we briefly talked about expectations when it comes to intimacy in a relationship.

       One aspect that struck attention had to do with why some girls get self-conscious when being intimate and one of the reasons were because they get criticized for being a freak. Most of the guys in the class were shocked that judgemental comments occur in relationships towards women. I've actually heard girls mentioned critical comments about being sexually expressive which is very puzzling. I had some conversations with some of my guy friends about this same issue to get a male perspective on it.

Some of the top 3 reasons of why some guys feel a girl is too freaky are:

1. Number of partners is probably too high.
2. The guy is intimidate by her skills.
3. Way too experienced.

           Those 3 reasons are what some men take into consideration. Some men even say if a girl is too good at what she does, then he'll question her experience. One would probably think the better she is, the more pleased he will be, and the more the relationship will be special, but is there really such thing as being too freaky? This question gets asked frequently especially amongst women because we tend to second guess ourselves when it comes to our bodies and sex life. The funny thing is when you ask a guy what is his ideal women, sometimes the answer is "a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets," one would think the freakier, the better.

     This goes to show you how important communication is in a relationship. Couples have to really make sure they are on the same page especially when it comes to their sex lives. Comforts levels tend to be bypassed when you are in the heat of the moment because one wants to desperately please the other partner. It is important to explain what makes you uncomfortable and find a solution to compromise with each other. Just make sure whatever if comfortable within the relationship is healthy and fun.

     Most people might think that this topic can be considered a double standard because society feel that men are biologically driven to be highly sexual because of their testosterone, but women have to be wholesome, submissive, and surpressed. It's a crazy and silly notion because why call us sexual beings if one species of beings are judged for being sexually. Notice, if you had a group of young adults and you ask how many men masturbate, they will all raise their hands with no problem. Ask that same question to women and you'll get cringing and a few giggles. If a girl does admit she does, she might even get called a freak even though she is doing something healthy.

     So why are women looked down upon sexually? What does being freaky actually mean?

NOTE: NOTICED I DIDN'T SAY ALL MEN JUDGE WOMEN FOR BEING FREAKY IN A RELATIONSHIP, I SAID SOME SO IF YOU MISUNDERSTOOD MY POST, THAT IS WHAT THIS MESSAGE IS STATING BECAUSE THEIR ARE WOMEN THAT JUDGE OTHER WOMEN AS WELL AS JUDGING OTHER MEN FOR BEING FREAKS.

      I would love to hear from others about what exactly is being too freaky or there such a thing as going to far in the bedroom? Express your thoughts about this issue.