Friday, June 7, 2013

Control Issues

We all want a sense of control in our lives. It makes us feel empowered and that we are standing up for ourselves, but when do we take it to far?

             People that are controlling sometimes tend to be insecure or too spoiled. They don't know when to stop and for others they can't help but to feed into that. Some controlling people don't care that they hurt your feelings and it's all about what they want. We all wants and needs that need to be fed, but there are limits to selfishness. Most of the control comes from the mind because there are different ways of going about being controlling. It can occur in a relationship in a friendship, families, work, sports, anywhere. Especially when someone has a specific title to live by they can't help but to be in control.
        
           When you look at relationships, the most complaints are about who's the boss in the relationships. Why should it matter who should be the controlling one. The two of you are in the relationship together, but yet someone has to be the boss. The women almost always wants to be in control at all times. She wants to control the house, her man, and the relationship and that's not fair. He didn't get with his mother he got with his girlfriend. The man wants control on a certain aspect because he is head of the household. Being that he is the provider and the protector he wants to be the boss all the time so then there is a power struggle. Of course there is also abusive relationships that deals with over control, but you already know how that goes.
            
          With friendships especially if you guys live together, control issues can definitely rise. Everyone wants there fair share but it can overlap. One wants the bedroom cleaned a certain way, the other wants their laundry separated, one wants things cooked a certain way and then there is a battle. It is also a matter of taking over like the bathroom or kitchen and being inconsiderate of other people. People want what they want, when they want it, and how they want it done and when all of you guys live that way, best believe a fight will break out.
      
         With families it's a very different dynamic because there are authorities involved. As you get older you start to realize what you want out of your life and what your goals are but sometimes you have haters and people blocking your way. Therefore there are going to be people that want you to do things a certain way and they want you to do it the way they want you to do it. It will frustrate you, but sometimes it's hard to disagree with someone. After battling back and forth sometimes you can't come to a complete conclusion so then you feel stuck. It's always to just go with your gut and see what happens.

Remember stay strong but not too strong!

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