Friday, June 21, 2013


The one place you don't want to be in when you realize you are in love with your friend.

         Some people say women started this friendzone concept, but who knows who started it. Sometimes what starts off as a friendship becomes so much more without you guys even trying. There have been love stories where people have been best friends their entire life and then once they got older and have seen each other through the good and bad, feelings start to build and they end up going out. Years later they get married and maybe have some kids. Most people would like that to happen but it doesn't. Both men and women get caught in the friendzone and it can be so frustrating because they think the answer to their friend's problems is right in front of them and they just don' see it. Most of the time the friend notices but you could not be their type. There is even a show on MTV called "Friendzone" that shows friends where one person wants to confess to the other that they want to be more than friends.


       Some of the reasons why men and women put each other in the friendzone are somewhat similar. It's certain aspects of the person is what differs between the two. When men put women in the friendzone, sometimes it's not just because he sees the girl as his sister or anything, it could be because he already has a girlfriend, but yet his female friend is in love with him. So of course out of respect for his girlfriend he has to keep other females in the friendzone. Other times it is simple because that's all he sees his female friend as just that, a friend and nothing more. It's so frustrating for the girl because either she grew an attraction for him and now she's crushing him or she probably started off liking him and now that they spend time together she falls in love.

        Now with women it's a little bit different. Fellas I know you've heard girls say, "You are like a brother to me," or "I wish I can find a guy like you," I know you get aggravated hearing that when are attracted to her, but here's somewhat of why females do that. I did a post about bad boys not too long ago and I mentioned why girls like them so much, even though the nice guy is everything she ever wanted in a man she doesn't take it further either because she is not physically attracted to him or his personality bores her. I know this sounds completely silly because it's like well everything she described that she wanted his right in front of her face. I know, but it goes back to what I said about good guys vs. bad boys. Most girls want a guy that has the good guy qualities in a bad boy's body. They want a guy that is rough around the edges because girls love attention and a lot of mental stimulation and then be catered to like a princess. With those needs, the combination of a good guy and a bad boy provides those for her. Sometimes what also happens is the girl could start to have feelings for the guy because they are around each other a lot, but she stops things before it happens because she doesn't want to ruin the friendship. Especially if you guys end up having a bad break up then it's like now what? Well most girls fear for that to happen so she feels comfortable just keeping the friendship healthy.

So how do you get out of the friendzone?

         Well, that's one of those things where it depends on the friends once again. Some people say just have sex with each other and that ends the friendship. The problem with that is it might be awkward around your mutual friends especially if you guys act funny around your peers. Other people might say just go on one date to see where it takes the relationship. Most of the time once you are in the friendzone, you are pretty much stuck there. You could potentially give yourself a makeover and look like the type that your friend likes, but majority of the times in either doesn't work or again the person doesn't want to ruin the friendship. Who knows maybe the person might come around or if you ever watched the show, "Moesha" you remember that Hakeem and Moesha finally took their friendship to another level once they hit college. They were best friends all of their life and then Hakeem realized that he can fall in love with Moesha, luckily she felt the same way. Until then don't do anything crazy and keep the current relationship healthy.

Here's a short film about the friendzone:

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